LINDSAY LOHAN TRIES OLD HOLLYWOOD AT THE PREMIERE OF 'LIZ & DICK' IN HOLLYWOOD

SIDE BOOB: CHECK

LOOKING OLDER THAN I SHOULD: CHECK

I ONLY KID BECAUSE I AM SAD FOR MISS LOHAN. THE PRETTY GIRL FROM 'MEAN GIRLS' HAS KIND OF BECOME COURTNEY LOVE. 

FOR THE LA PREMIERE OF 'LIZ & DICK' HELD AT THE BEVERLY HILLS HOTEL. LOHAN TRIED FOR SOME OLD HOLLYWOOD GLAMOUR IN A DONNA DASHINI DRESS. BUT I THINK SHE COMES ACROSS LOOKING LIKE ONE OF HUGH HEFNER'S GIRLFRIENDS. BLESS HER HEART, AT LEAST SHE WORE CLOTHES.

I THINK THIS LOOK AGES HER AND THE FABRIC CAN GO ONE OF TWO WAYS 'EXPENSIVE' OR 'CHEAP AND NASTY'.

I HAVE TO GIVE PROPS TO THE DESIGNER FOR ATTEMPTING TO MAKE LOHAN SEMI 'MOVIE STAR' (AT LEAST B GRADE). 

THE ONE THING I HATE ABOUT THE WHOLE THING IS HER MAKE UP. HER LIPS ESPECIALLY. HER PLASTIC SURGEON SHOULD HAVE HIS ASS KICKED. ISN'T PLASTIC SURGERY MEANT TO MAKE YOU LOOK YOUNGER?

UNSURE ABOUT THE FUR STOLL. DON'T MEAN TO GET ALL 'PETA', BUT SHOULDN'T SHE KNOW BETTER?

BOOB COVERAGE LINDSAY. THIS OBSESSION WITH SHOWING SIDE BOOB HAS TO STOP.

I JUST WANT LINDSAY TO DO WELL. I ROOTED FOR HER DURING HER MEDIOCRE PERFORMANCE ON 'SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE'.

RESULTS: HEY SHE TRIED!!!